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Saying "Goodbye" to Sleepovers

Do you ever get asked if your kids can have a sleepover or a "late night"?  Well it comes up on the daily around here.  How do you feel about sleepovers?  Don't get me wrong, I really don't want to be the one who ruins my children's lives or a good time (even though that's how they might make me feel).  I want nothing more than for my kids to have a happy and memorable childhood.  But, I am also not naïve to the risks and dangers that could go wrong when our children are away from home.  Don't get me wrong, I've heard stories of accidents and even sexual abuse, and I'm not naïve to the dangers of pornography or evil.   All these things we want to keep our children protected from.  But that is not my only reason for saying "no" to a sleepover or a late night for that matter.

I was reminded of this the other day when my four year old daughter was having a hard time leaving a friends house.  That's pretty normal, right?  I mean she's enjoying her friends, their toys, their home and their mom is so nice!  But the time came when she needed to say goodbye and that was that.  She came, but it wasn't without a lot of crying!!!

Later that day, my 10 year old asked his daily question if he could have a sleepover with his best friend and our old neighbors, whom we love and know really well.  We moved away from them a couple years ago and their friendship is still really strong.  Getting them together is a little bit trickier now, arranging rides from here to there is always something to work out.  And no matter what, I'll have to arrange to get him home eventually (unless they are offering him to move in with them, which I am also open to, j.k.).  So, I wasn't quite sure what to do.  Do we allow sleepovers, do we not?  I tried to stay reasonable as I discussed the matter over with my son and my friends mom.  And, let's not forget, that I've learned whatever I do or say to him, I will be held accountable to my other four children who are all going to want to say and do the same thing!  But then it dawned on me, that the same principle of saying goodbye to a friend that applied to my four year old earlier that day also needed to apply to my 10 year old right then!!!

So, it came to the point where I just had to tell him that he needed to learn to say "goodbye".  I even told him that his little sister had to learn to say goodbye earlier that day (and that was something he could relate to).  He eventually got my message.

Saying goodbye takes a lot of maturity, believe it or not.  I had never realized that this is just one more step along the way to becoming who we want to become.  When we say goodbye, we are saying that our home and family are still our number one place and priority in our lives.  Learning to say goodbye is something we should learn at an early age, and the earlier the better! I can imagine one day, my 10 year old son will be old enough to meet a young lady.  I imagine he'll date a lot and oh how I hope and he will have learned the master of  "goodbies" by then!  You get my point.

Let us all hold our children a little closer and cherish the relatively small time that we have with them.  I know the home is the most safe and sacred place on earth.  In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

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